


on the tip of your tongue

by antrchrist



Category: Dynasty (TV 2017)
Genre: Angst, Arguing, Break Up, F/F, Heavy Angst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-10
Updated: 2020-05-10
Packaged: 2021-03-03 00:26:58
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,065
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24105916
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/antrchrist/pseuds/antrchrist
Summary: i wish you were the person you used to be
Relationships: Kirby Anders & Fallon Carrington, Kirby Anders/Fallon Carrington
Comments: 7
Kudos: 17





	on the tip of your tongue

**Author's Note:**

> i haven’t written in months! my bad! just needed to get some shit off my chest so that’s what this is

“You don’t understand, I  _ need  _ you here with me.”

Silence. The faint sound of static echoed through the line.

Kirby knew the other woman could hear her breathing, no,  _ hyperventilating _ , on the other line.

“I c-can’t do this right now,” she was crying now, too hard to be understood, really.

After a couple seconds of shuffling, Kirby hung up. Slowly, she set down her phone, her eyes beginning to sting from how much she tried to wipe away what felt like an endless stream of tears. She had been home for a couple of hours but if you had walked in and looked around, it looked like no one had touched her apartment in days. Normally, she never left the manor, choosing to spend all the time she could with Fallon rather than come home to her own bed. This was the first time in a long time that Kirby had come home and by the looks of it, she wouldn’t have anywhere else to go soon.

As she stood up, she felt like she was floating, the faint sound of her phone vibrating barely registering. Looking down at her hands through blurred vision, she couldn’t even register that they belonged to her. As she walked to her room, her tears began to subside, a dull, numb feeling beginning to take place in her chest. For the rest of the night, she felt like she was switched on autopilot. Her body making her dinner and eventually eating it, but none of it was anything she planned to do consciously.

Eventually, she ended up in bed, her TV providing background noise for the millions of thoughts racing in her mind. Over time, all the overlapping noise blended together to make a loud buzzing that felt more comfortable than having to think about the past twelve hours. 

The sound of knocking at her front door caught her attention. In the back of her mind she knew it was Fallon, but she stood up to open it regardless. Before she could reach for the doorknob, it twisted open as if it had a mind of its own. She looked up to find Fallon’s blue eyes staring into her own, the key to Kirby’s apartment in her hand.

“What are you doing here?”

“I… I know you can’t sleep on your own… I figured just… one more night?”

The red-haired woman blinked.

“Why would you-”

“Just forget about our fight for two seconds,” Fallon cut her off, “Just one more night so you can get some sleep.”

Silently, Kirby nodded and allowed herself to be dragged to her room.

-

The next morning, Kirby woke up to Fallon staring down at her and for a second she forgot they’d even fought in the first place. For a brief, fleeting moment, she didn’t want to punch Fallon for everything she put her through. Until a look of discomfort found its way onto Fallon’s face and the red-haired woman’s stomach twisted to suddenly she felt like throwing up.

“I think we should talk, Kirb.”

Kirby’s chest tightened, “What? About how you completely screwed me over? About how you decided that for the past  _ three years  _ your feelings trumped mine? Sure! Let’s talk about it!”

Now Kirby was up and pacing back and forth in front of her bed. Fallon watched her anxiously scratch her upper arm until it turned bright pink, a habit she’d noticed a year into their relationship.

“Kirby, I didn’t  _ mean  _ to hurt you, I didn’t know what to do. I was just… so scared of being alone,” she took a deep breath before continuing, “I’m  _ sorry.” _

Kirby stopped pacing, taking a deep breath and counting to ten on her fingers, another habit Fallon noticed when the taller woman was trying not to let her feelings get the better of her.

“Y’know… I should be yelling at you right now, I should be throwing shit at you, kicking you out of my home. But y’know  _ what  _ Fallon, I’m just  _ so fucking tired  _ of you. For years, I put my life on hold for you, I gave you space even when you didn’t even have the decency to do that for me, but you were just  _ never  _ satisfied, were you?”

Her words hung in the air, Fallon averted her gaze from Kirby, suddenly finding the design on the blanket in front of her more interesting than the conversation at hand.

Kirby chuckled before continuing, “I love you, Fallon. I’ve loved you since we were kids but you’ve changed  _ so much.  _ You’re draining, and toxic… and I can’t stand to be around you anymore. All I asked was that you loved me even just a fraction of the amount I ever loved you but you couldn’t even do that.”

“Kirby… I-” Fallon’s words caught in her throat until she finally managed, “Please don’t leave me alone.”

“You  _ still  _ won’t think of anyone but yourself, were you even _ listening  _ to me?”

“Kirby-”

“Leave your key on the table on your way out,” the taller woman demanded.

-

_ Kirby’s phone rang on her nightstand, the sudden bright light it emitted practically blinding her as she slid her finger on the screen to answer. _

_ “God, Fallon, this better be good.” _

_ “I’m sorry, did I wake you,” Fallon’s voice sounded alert and awake like it wasn’t the dead of night, “Listen, I just wanted to ask if you wanted to go out sometime?” _

_ “Did you really call me at three a.m. to ask me out? Jesus, Fallon.” _

_ “Is that a yes?” _

_ “You’re paying to make up for the sleep I’m missing right now.” _

Kirby smiled sadly at the memory, not paying attention to the tears rolling down her cheeks. In front of her sat a box of Fallon’s clothes she had left behind in her apartment. Kirby never bothered to call and ask if she wanted them back, considering the woman was a billionaire that could probably replace whatever she couldn’t find. Looking at the box one more time, Kirby picked up its contents, emptying them into the fire pit in front of her. Behind her, Sam wrapped his arms around her as she broke out into sobs, barely being able to stop long enough to breathe. The faint scent of what was left of Fallon stuck to Kirby’s clothes bringing her comfort for the first time in months.

  
  


**_This is my goodbye to you._ **


End file.
